You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize