Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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