We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
