im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
smell my finger.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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