That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
