I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
