By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
