Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
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