u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
