My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize