He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
