why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
