you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
