It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
