I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
