i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Randomize
