I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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