eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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