this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize