the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
We left an ass print on the piano.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize