Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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