Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.