There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
