Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize