Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Mom said you looked used
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
