I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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