he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
