You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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