So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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