he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
