Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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