My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
