you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
