She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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