Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
