thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
