Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
