Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
He kissed a someone with a penis
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
