I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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