What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
