Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Randomize
