Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
