Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
