I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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