you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize