I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize
