I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
