you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize