508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
