ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
i think i just lost a toe
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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